Required Headgear

I spent so many years thinking all these silly vestments, and hats, and rituals, and incense and ringing bells and holy days all meant something. But it’s all just a way to make the flock feel like there is some significance to the equally silly pretensions underlying all religion. It’s just an elaborate smokescreen to paint a veneer of respectability over a much more insidious process happening outside our view.

I understand the real human need for some sense of spirituality, a need for an explanation for the mysteries of nature before we had the ability or knowledge (read: science) to figure them out, and the subsequent creation of religious explanations for the unknown. I understand how religion filled that need, and if they had left it as a personal explanation that simply filled the gaps with god until science came along, we’d have been better off.

But then religion became an institution, with a hierarchy, and leaders, and that brought a natural inclination to usurp the respect that leaders generally create for their positions, and the power that came with it. It was inevitable that men would eventually figure out that there was nothing “behind the curtain”, so more elaborate curtains had to be created, with taboos and penalties (sin) for peeking. They took advantage of the human tendency to be awed by glitter and pomp, by the appearance of wealth and prestige.They hid their shallow beliefs behind a mask of believability, in the process deceiving us into thinking there was actual substance there.

Take all the “stupid fucking headgear” away and all you’re left with is men foisting their credulous nonsense on the rest of us, while taking advantage of our complacency, enjoying the power and prestige and wealth of their church behind the curtain. It’s this acquiescence to dress-up make-believe that directly led to priests’ abuse of little children, thinking the curtain hid them from view.

In reality, these emperors are butt-naked.

14 thoughts on “Required Headgear

  1. I agree with you in so many ways regarding this post. The love of power, glitter, pomp and ceremony take center stage in spite of the teachings of Jesus. He repudiated the need for a hierarchy and the leaders of his flock were to be servants first of all. There is, indeed, “…nothing behind the curtain.” Underneath the vestments are humans who have agreed to play “dress-up” to placate the masses. Their complacency allows such charades to continue. The actual substance is Christ himself.

  2. We’ll make an atheist out of you yet, Dwight. As soon as you accept the probability that Christ never existed, 😉

    Not holding my breath though…

  3. For the top picture, are you sure they’re for real? They look like geeks attending a magic convention.

    For the second picture, it looks like someone has overgolded.

    • It’s difficult to tell the difference between real religious leaders and geeks playing dress up. Take this for example:

      As for the teachings of the Jesus character, they’re a mixed bag. His version of the Golden Rule, for instance, discourages empathy. Matt Dillahunty has a rather lengthy breakdown of the failings of the Sermon on the Mount. Google it.

  4. We Pastafarians already have religious regalia for you – Pirate costumes! They are way more fun than those old pretensious robes, and anything goes, since a Pirate would have worn whatever he or she could pillage. My Pirate hat is way bigger than most of those other religious hats, and certainly every bit as stupid.

      • Well sure, but it keeps one eye adapted for night-vision at all times. We can duck below decks, switch which eye the eye-patch is on, and be ready to fire the canons. Let’s see the pope try that with his regalia!

        Our religion doesn’t have any depth anyway, so no big loss.

          • The Mythbusters even tested the effect of an eye-patch on night vision. It actually does work.

            Versatility, flimsy moral standards, and way better communion meals! That’s us!

  5. Pingback: The Supremacy of language, heaven, god, and society « JRFibonacci's blog: partnering with reality

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