My Comment Policy

One troll, who seems to have nothing better to do than go to blogs and attempt to disrupt them, has now questioned my comment policy. This troll, who trolls only on weekends,  is convinced that I moderate and/or delete his comments, and there are others who would like to believe it. Of course, this troll is also convinced there is a sky daddy who’s going to take care of him when he dies, who will rapture him to heaven because he’s well hung and generally has a disturbed pleasant disposition (OK. That’s a slight exaggeration).  He also believes that the rest of us heathens will be struck down at the time of his rapture, and thrown into the Lake of Fire (a ride at Disney World, I presume). He’s chuckling over the prospect as you read this. He’s clearly a few cards shy of a whole deck, perhaps even missing all of them save the Jokers.

So that normal people can understand what my actual comment policy is, let me reiterate it:

I.Do.Not.Have.A.Policy

As part of my non-policy:

  • I tolerate trolls – to a point.
  • I do not delete comments.
  • I have never deleted a comment.
  • My spam filter is run by Akismet, which came with the blog from WordPress, over which I have no control other than as set forth below.
  • My Akismet spam filter allows me to catch comments that have [X] number of hyperlinks. I have [X] set to three.
  • My Akismet spam filter allows me to hold any comment with any predetermined content, name,  IP,  URL, or email or other predetermined words.
  • For the life of this blog I have had only one predetermined email in the moderation queue, an early troll, whose address you can see on the screenshot of the settings page in my Dashboard, along with all the other settings. Feel free to become his email pen-pal. He was loads of fun.
  • Occasionally, legitimate comments are found in the moderation queue. When that happens, 100% of the time, I release them to the blog, i.e. they are published.
  • WordPress is free. I don’t complain, so neither should you.

If for some reason you leave a comment and feel you’re being treated unfairly, just remember: Life’s a bitch, and then you die. This is a blog. This is not life. If you think it is, you need to get one of your own. A life, that is. Maybe even your own blog. And a pacifier.

If you still feel that your comment has been moderated out of existence, it’s probably a figment of your imagination, just like your god. In any event, go piss on Akismet. I don’t want to hear about it.

In the future, I’m seriously considering instituting a ban on trolls who post comments for the clear purpose of disruption, with the secondary purpose of stroking their overinflated egos. If a series of comments appears to have one or both of those purposes, and no other, or is entirely non-responsive to the post, then I might exercise my prerogative to do so. If I do, I will clearly say so. Whatever I do, it will be clearly in keeping with my non-policy.

This is entirely against my instincts and principles, but I find I’m wasting far too much time and energy dealing with this tripe. Of course, if I think that the comments brilliantly showcase the idiocy of the commenter, and the silly, inane, juvenile thinking process he or she uses, then the comments will probably stay as the best advertisement for atheism and/or rationality I could possibly find. Just don’t expect a response to them.

And since this is my blog, there will be no comments to my comment non-policy.