Jesus In The Drywall

He’s at it again. Jesus is showing up in the strangest places. First it was a slice of toast, then an underpass wall (oh, wait, that was his mother), then the hind end of a dog, even in a carrot.  Will the miracles never cease? Now he shows up in the corner of a room being prepared for construction, in a smear of drying wallboard mud. Of course, as one of the commenters mentioned, it’s really not Jesus, it’s Karl Marx, and frankly, I’d have to agree. It does look like Karl Marx. There’s the high forehead, the brooding eyes, the darker mustache. Or it could be Edgar Allen Poe. Here. You decide.

This is really pathetic. It’s a manifestation of the phenomena of people believing what they want to believe. They really want to believe in Jesus, they have no evidence that he actually exists or, for that matter, ever existed, so when they see something, anything, that looks….let’s say out of the ordinary…. they grasp at it and use it to confirm and justify their otherwise unsupportable beliefs.  This man with a piece of lumber is attempting to do the same thing.

It’s also another example of Pareidolia which I previously wrote about here.

This story came from the Mobile, Alabama/Florida panhandle area, deep in the Bible belt. Is that surprising? An area where there is the largest concentration of blind belief in Jesus? At least one person who witnessed this had the presence of mind to apply a little skepticism.

His brother-in-law is not so sure. “It’s just open to personal interpretation of what you see. I do see a face. As far as putting what that face looks like, I don’t want to go that route,” says Gissendanner.

I would love to know where the god of the Great Miracles is these days. The one who created the universe with a snap of his fingers. The one who opened a path through the Red Sea for Moses and the Israelites. The one who tore down the walls of Jericho, and destroyed the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. Where is he, now that we have 24/7/365 scrutiny, with webcams and traffic cameras at every street corner? When we have the ability to scientifically test each and every miraculous claim? Where is this god? Is it that he’s just too busy showing his presumed face in drywall mud that will be covered up with kitchen cabinets, grilled cheese that will be eaten, and carrots that will be sliced into a stew, to make another grand statement of naked power?

It seems that his miraculous powers have faded into mediocrity.

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12 thoughts on “Jesus In The Drywall

  1. Hey my Dalmatian has a little spot on her rump that looks EXACTLY like a heart. Get it? It’s the HEART of Jesus love for the world. It’s so obvious, I shouldn’t even have to explain it.

  2. Oh, My. Google. People in my area are fuckin’ insane, aren’t they? I live in Pensacola, just across the Florida-Alabama border from Mobile. This is kind of why I don’t watch the local news–I don’t like being depressed.

    Personally, I think it looks more like Karl Marx. Plus, it’s funny to think of Jesus being compared to that godless Commie.

  3. Evo

    Get it? It’s the HEART of Jesus love for the world. It’s so obvious, I shouldn’t even have to explain it.

    And you call yourself an atheist?


    Carrot Jesus could make big bucks as a porn star.

    Or as a dildo.


    People in my area are fuckin’ insane, aren’t they? I live in Pensacola, just across the Florida-Alabama border from Mobile.

    I used to think Florida would be a great place to retire. Since 2000, I’ve been rethinking that. Now, Canada looks quite appealing.


    I think it looks like an old guy in a fake Santa beard. Which goes to prove … old guys exist.

    I think he looks like Meher Baba, which would make it Buddhist Pareidolia.


    I think it’s Walt Whitman, you know, the guy who invented the box of chocolates.

    And hence, made in America.


    Its my Uncle Bert – sure of it.

    I need proof. A picture, another sighting, something to hang my hat on. Until then, I reserve judgment. Unless this is your Uncle Bert.

  4. Florida, at least my area, is not at all a good place to retire, I think. Not just because of the humidity (It’s not so bad here, actually. Some winters we even get frost!), hurricanes, and all that, but it is just not all it’s cracked up to be, honestly. Plus, the whole redneck factor is a problem.

    However, Canada is quite nice. I have family in Toronto, and I have to say that it’s great. The only fault I can find is the snow, silly Floridian that I am. Toronto as a city is beautiful, and is maintained wonderfully. They even have beaches on the Great Lakes up there!

  5. “The question is: Can Sarah Palin see that face from her house?”

    It’s not the drywall that counts now! They are seeking him in the plumbing now, the old has passed away, so Sarah is searching the copper pipes in her walls for the Image of Jesus now! And she checking her house so she can see it from there!

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