Was He Dropped On His Head At Birth?

God has sent Christopher Hitchens to hell because he loves him.

This is clearly what happens when a perfectly viable human being is dropped on his head at birth, either by the doctor as he’s pulled out of his womb, or by his mother when she got a good look at him. His brains get scrambled, the synapses in his skull don’t fire as they are supposed to, information doesn’t get sorted properly, and stupidity, sheer idiotic lunacy, comes out of his mouth.

It’s either that, or he’s a Christian.

You decide.

7 thoughts on “Was He Dropped On His Head At Birth?

  1. “[I]f the scriptures mean anything….” Great opening line.

    Here’s perhaps one of the few times Christians need to be more like their god character – ‘in the end you give people what they really want because you love them’. So stop blocking the gays and lesbians from getting married, stop denying women their reproductive rights, stop denying children the educations they want and need, stop denying medical care, stop denying sex education and condom distribution to teens and developing nations, and just generally stop subjecting non-believers to your religion. IF your religion is REALLY about love, THEN wtf are you doing?

    I always have to wonder if these people are truly so misinformed as to think atheism is some defiance of something known or they’re just parading that straw man around to maintain the misinformation for others.

    Anyway, he is right about one thing. The way Christians describe their Heaven, that’s no place I’d want to spend eternity. I’d vote for Valhala. Now that sounds like a fun place, but even that would probably get boring after awhile. Maybe all the afterlife destinations could work out an exchange program. Imagine a big after life cruise ship, with stops at Valhala or Elysium. Maybe you can take haunting holidays.

    You know, religious people really lack imaginations. I mean, what did that take me? A couple of minutes? Meh

    • Here’s perhaps one of the few times Christians need to be more like their god character – ‘in the end you give people what they really want because you love them’….. stop subjecting non-believers to your religion.

      Amen Brother Phillychief!

  2. I have never seen this guy . . . but I expect douche bags would take offense at being compared to him.

    I was on a brief discussion with someone regarding them saying Hitchens had a change of heart at the last. There is no measure to the contempt I feel for such people. Even more than for those who openly rejoice his passing.

  3. I absolutely LOVE this character! That’s why I was giving him the finger the whole time he was talking. I give those I love what they insist on.

  4. The way Christians describe their Heaven, that’s no place I’d want to spend eternity.

    Phillychief, as I like to say, any place where one would have to spend an eternity with Rhology couldn’t possibly be heaven.

  5. In a way, wouldn’t Christian Heaven really be a form of Hell for most Christians- if EVERY Christian was allowed to be there? It would be an eternity of people telling each other “you’re doing it wrong”. It could be worth going to Christian Heaven just to watch that, or the looks on their faces as new Christians come in. You know the look, the “ew, they let them in?” look.

    Btw, has anyone seen Paul? Kristen Wiig plays a YEC. It’s a funnier movie than I thought it would be.

Comments are closed.